I have 1 irrational fear. That is I cannot swim alone in swimming pool. Because I’m afraid there’s crocodile in it. Each time I tell my friend, they will laugh until their tears come out. They suppose someone so logic and forward thinking person like me wouldn’t have such fear. Since crocodile in a civilized swimming pool is not justified. But, I just can’t go around it.

So recently I’ve been swimming a lot because I decided be more serious about my back injury. I want to first fully recover from my injury before getting back into my sports routine. Swimming is the only sport I find that doesn’t make my injury worst (not cycling, not yoga). I’m beginning to swim at 400m, my aim is to be able to swim at 1000m. Ha, but I’m not sure if I could really do that. Regardless, yesterday weather was a little gloomy after some rain in the noon.

So once I reached MGCC, I asked the girl at the counter if I could peek there’s anyone at the pool first. To my surprise, nobody was at the pool. And the pool water was as calm as a perfect breeding space for crocodile. So, like that, I just left the pool. Arghhhhh… how wish I could muster the courage to swim alone. It’s such an inconvenience! Imagine, halfway swimming, the everyone leave, and I’m just at my 200m swimming lap. Niaseng.

I just didn’t believed what I’ve heard from a friend yesterday. He was someone I was very close to during my trip in his country. Friendly, fun, silly and just maybe a little hippie to my liking. But I really didn’t expect him telling me something like that. I didn’t expect a person like him would do something so unimaginable. But I didn’t have the gut to tell him on his face nor I could tell another person about him. Therefore, I’m glad that I have a blog to express my thoughts.

So story has it, my friend have a child with another friend. They didn’t get married and now he’s seeing another girl. He’s currently undergoing many emotions. Confused, happy, and sad. He’s someone who make decision based on what makes him feel good. But I personally think, the mind and emotions should be connected in making decision. Decision made purely based on emotions and impulse will make us act like animals, and decision made sole based on mind and logic will make us no difference to a machine. Therefore, it has to be a combination on both, which what makes us human.

I’m not in position to judge weather what he’s doing is right or wrong. As I didn’t know much about his situation. But I could only advice and have faith he will make the right decisions. Since he told me, he felt aimless without goals, I told him that he should imagine when he’s 80, what type of life he wished to have lived. Then perhaps, the smaller nearer goals would make sense to him and give directions about what he should do at this very moment. English have a saying, if you aim for the star, at least if you didn’t you would still land on the moon.

Let’s not live life with regrets as everyday is a new chance to make things right.

If you didn’t know by now, I’m someone who have zero patience for stupidity. Especially for people who owns a car and have no idea how to socialize on the road. I wish there’s a lane for stupid people.

So yesterday, I was all dressed up, pretty and tapau-ed my favourite lok lok back home from work. Then there’s this black color wira double parked next to my car. I CLEARLY saw a dude went into the car and before I gotten into mine and there’s a driver in the car. So I got in, and expect the car would SCOOT over and let me drive away, because HELLO you are blocking my way. But 3mins LATER… no. The black wira did not move. So I reversed and can’t go away either, I politely honked him, but he did not move either. What, your legs broken when trying to press the accelerator? Damn, I was so mad that I have to struggle my way out.

Yea, mebe I was bad at reversing, but YOU are the one who double park, so there’s some courtesy to move away for others. After good few minutes looking at my struggle only some sense come to the black wira to drive away. By the time, this pretty girl who had tapau-ed her favourite lok lok furiously pointed middle finger to the black wira. All the class, all the chicness all go to longkang. I can only imagine bad I looked at the moment but I was on fire. I don’t care.

Here are some other road stupidity that could lit me up:-

1. Take forever to drive away from the parking spot even the whole kampung is already in the car. Why, because below the car have eggs, need to wait the eggs to hatch and chicks come out of it is it? Ko peram je tempat parking tu.
2. Do not raise signal when you want to turn into junction. So you want people see how to swag-ly turn your car into the junction. Btw, there’s a class on signal. You should sign up.
3. Car like ping pong, honk sound like king kong. Have you ever come across a myvi, but when they honk, it sounded like a 10-tonner lorry. Yes, I have come across that. I was so shocked that I almost shit in my pants. So much fun, no.
4. You are on slow lane and these idiot tail so closely at your back. Because petrol price increase, so they could benefit from driving closer to my car. But you know what could burn a hole in your pocket? When I press the freaking brakes. That’s when you have to pay for my bumper and your car.
5. Drive slow slow at 20km/h. Uncle, please consider cycling. Don’t drive a car.

What are your pet peeves when it comes to driving? Have you ever come across a black wira incident like I do? Most importantly how to maintain your cool? Geez. I wish I could

It’s been almost a month long since I resume running regularly. Before CNY, I was at my fittest, running 5K at 6:45/km pace, but I stopped after bad knee pain. Then once I thought I recovered, I quickly rushed back to my old pace, then my lower lumbar started to give me problem. It’s been loong loong time since I injured my spine. But, I knew my body has already gave me signal that I should rest.

It’s been 2 weeks now, after my reflexology session with my aunt. I’m slowly resuming back to my badminton, running and cycling routine. But every step I took, I need to be mindful, not to rush through and not be disappointed if my performance sucks. The video pretty much sums up what I need to do for tonight’s run: START SLOW

Yesterday 2 different staff come to me for 2 different reason.

Staff A, he told me that he had misplaced customer’s cash. He agreed to deduct his salary. He said he have checked all possible place and yet no able to find it. So, he asked me a favour to deduct his salary starting next month instead of this, as he has to prepare for Raya. I agreed to it.

Staff B, she told there’s someone in a church gathering who is contracted with Covid19. Although she has not spoken to the person, but I advice her to get a swab test. So she asked if she could claim under company, I said no. Because the exposure to covid 19 is not due to work, but personal activity. So I will not pay for it. Then she say, she could come for work because she think is ok, and if I ask her quarantine also can, but should not be under no pay leave. And told me because government said so. I told her because government did not ask you to quarantine, so you didn’t want to pay for swab, so I could only ask you to stay home on no pay leave.

Well, 2 situation, the way 2 staff approach me is different. One with respect and asked for a favor. The other, I felt threatened if I do not comply. Who you want to help? Sorry, even you’re the most outstanding staff, you are still dispensable. Chinese have a saying, “这个世界没有说谁不能没有谁“, means in this world, we are able to survive without anyone. Maybe, if staff B asked properly, I would’ve even considered to pay for her swab test. But because she threatened me for possible consequences for not complying to her request, I’m sorry. My world doesn’t work in this manner.

As for staff A, I’m considering to give him a parkson voucher to buy a new pair of pants, because he misplaced the money because there’s a hole in his pants. I was told that he may have taken the money, but I choose to believe him because the way of his approach.

Remember, when you ask for favor, mind your manners.

Recently, I did a health screening. Turns out, all my uric acid and bad cholesterol readings 2 years ago have completely recovered! What a good news. I didn’t knew what I did. But, after the last screening, I’m more mindful about eating soy based products and animal innards. As for the bad cholesterol, the pathologist suspect was reduced with regular exercise. Regardless, I am grateful to have a healthy body. I wish to stay in this state for as long as I could.

What do you do when you’re in your prime?

Some people busy finding money, some people bust finding their other half, while some people just go with the flow. I guess, if some things after we have put in our heart and effort to it, but yet things are not meant to be, we should not force it. Let nature take its course and see how it unfolds.

I remember on my first piano examination when I was 12 years old, I was so nervous that I barely slept. Prior I get off the car at the examination hall, I asked my mom, what will happen if I failed the test? She just smiled to me and said “Then you ask yourself, if you’d given your best?” That very moment, I knew that’s all mattered.

From that day onward, I learnt that life is about a journey. You could live a mediocre life, never trying your best and wondering what if you did your best OR give in your heart and soul to your dreams and aspiration. I’m for the second, because even if I failed, I knew once upon a time, I tried.

Sounds like a contrasting and confusing write-up ay? No, not at all.

What I’m trying to convey here is that, in my prime, when I have all the resources, I want to give in my very best in achieving the things I want in life. But, if some things are not meant to be, I will not force it and dwell over one failure. My prime is finite, and life is so much more than that.

Today I read about Yuri Gagarin, the Russian Astronaut. He was actually the first man send out to outer space as opposed to Neil Armstrong the American Astronaut, whom I only knew as a child. It was a time in human history, where both Russia and America were on the space race. I guess we didn’t knew much about Yuri because Russia weren’t as close to Malaysia as America back in those time. And how America loves to paint Russian as villians, think Marvel and DC Comics. Well, that’s another topic altogether.

So imagine, back then there’s only this much we knew about outer space. And the closest reference we had was sending a dog to the outer space. Yuri was chosen among the 12 candidates to be the first man because of his calm demeanor, fast learning ability and able to carry a bright smile even in the face of pressure and backlashes. It made sense that he was the ultimate choice, as when we’re in space, there will be not enough oxygen to our brain, and if anything fail and at the brink of dying, you don’t want someone who frantically presses the wrong buttons and make stupid decisions. In such tense situation, we needed someone who still able to maintain their composure and make right decisions. Finally, Yuri became the first Astronaut to tour the space and came back in one piece. He died several years later from a jet crash, few months after that Neil Armstrong become the first man to land on moon and make waves throughout the world. Regardless, Yuri is still the pioneer, less decorated hero, who explored the unknown.

From Yuri’s story, I want to be like him. Stay calm, even in the face of adversity. Sorry customers, I may have called you stupid – sometimes 😛